Over the course of 16 years I’ve heard from thousands of people struggling with so-called career “problems.” These problems invariably involve reasons why they can’t (or won’t) pursue their true passion.

I don’t mean to be dismissive of anyone’s feelings. Clearly to them these things certainly *feel* like problems.

It’s just that when you view the world through the lens of optimism and creative self-employment as I do, you discover that most opportunities come disguised as problems.

This article began as a response to a deluge of FAQ coming in from people interested in “profiting from your passions” career coaching I do. Half way through my response I realized that the same mental roadblocks that keep the people you’re about to meet from pursuing this particular path are really no different than for most of my readers seeking to change course. Fortunately, the solutions are universal as well.

In fact, these problems are no different than those I hear from anyone on the fence about making the leap from having a boss to being their own boss.

The good news is most problems that seem daunting are actually pretty easy to solve.

Easy To Solve Problem #1:  “I have too many interests”

Kate has lots of interests – none of which have anything to do with her work as a financial analyst. She describes herself as “addicted to scrapbooking,” spends hours happily researching things online, and before she got stuck with a two hour a day commute, was an avid golfer.

Another one of Kate’s passions is being a cheerleader for following one’s passion. She writes:

“I’m always looking at possibilities and trying to help my friends or co-workers or even total strangers who know they’re on the wrong path.” Adding, “One friend who is a cat lover calls me the answer lady because I’m constantly researching cool things she could do in the cat world”

The idea of people actually paying her to do what she’s been doing all along for free is, in Kate’s words, “too good to be true.”

But Kate is worried. “What if I take your course only to find out it’s not THE passion?”

The Opportunity

First, I deal with clients on a weekly basis who have been so beaten down by their 9-to-5 grind that they no longer even know what they love to do.

So loving lots of things is actually not a bad “problem” to have. It means you have options.

Still Kate is afraid that by saying ‘”yes” to one thing, she’ll be closing the door on other options.

Barbara Sher literally wrote the book on so-called “scanners”. It’s called Refuse to Choose. Trying to pick just one interest she says, is like trying to decide which kid you’re going to feed! They’re your passions so you have to find a way to feed them all!

Being an “outside the job box” career coach or teaching scrapbooking or leading golf trips doesn’t need to be the one and only thing Kate does.

She can do any one of these things for 3 hours a week, 10 hours a week, 20, 30… Or in the case of the golf outings, it could be a few times a year.

Not only will life be more satisfying but in the end you may end up making more money. Which leads me to the next “problem.”

Easy to Solve Problem #2: “Will I make enough money?”

Matt has been unemployed for a little over a year. As devastating as it was to lose his job, he’d been miserable in his programmer job for ten years.

“I always wanted to be my own boss,” he tells me. “But I never had the nerve.” Matt is inspired by the idea of helping other burned out programmers find their calling.

His big worry: “Will I make enough money?” Sound familiar?

So often we get hung up trying to come up with that brilliant business idea to replace our salary that we miss the opportunity.

The Opportunity

Money is always going to be a concern.

The solution is to understand both the beauty and the functionality of Barbara Winter’s brilliant concept of creating multiple income streams.

When I started out, I had two profit centers – my job at the time (which my friend Suzanne Evan’s encourages aspiring self-bossers to think of as your “business loan”) and one eBook. Now I have at least seven.

Instead of feeling pressured to make $75,000 a year doing one thing, think in terms of doing say three things that each generate $25,000. In Kate’s case, these profit centers might be very different.

For Matt, they could all relate to the same central theme of helping other programmers escape the job box. In addition to having individual client’s he could do group coaching or offer workshops.

He could also research or do interviews with programmers who’ve started cool side businesses and create an information product called “21 Fun and Profitable Ways Recovering Programmers Can Make Money on the Side.”

When you realize that in order to hit your first profit center goal of $25,000 means only needing to bring in a little over $68 a day, it feels more doable. Heck I could probably sell stuff in my basement on eBay and make that.

And remember, you don’t need to do everything all at once. Start one profit center. Then once that’s got some head wind, launch another.

Bonus tip: Unfortunately too many people spend all their time fretting about whether they can make $100,000 that they never end up doing. If that’s you, why not see how much fun you can have making your first $100 and go from there.

Easy To Solve Problem #3: “Is there really enough of a market for this?”

A few years ago I received this from Joanne:

“I work in a large dysfunctional organization. There’s a big shake up going on and lots of bad management decisions. Everyone is miserable — including me. I’m the one everyone comes to for advice about how to get through this mess but I know they aren’t the types to quit their jobs to follow their bliss.”

“I desperately want out but I’m just afraid there’s not enough of a market out there for this kind of work.”

Even though Joanne is worrying specifically about the market for outside the job box career coaching, the same advice applies when considering any potential business.

Opportunity

Let’s review… Everyone around her is miserable… and Joanne doesn’t think there’s a market for people who can help burned out cubicle dwellers get the heck out?!?

Determining market potential is basically a number crunching exercise. Let’s just take Joanne’s own company as an example.

If there are 100,000 employees and only 5 out of every 100 were open to exploring creative ways to make a living without a job – that’s 500 people in her company alone. The same thing is going to be true for employees of the hundreds of thousands of big corporations around the world.

In fact, according to the Kaufmann Foundation, baby boomers are the fastest growing group starting businesses. As one of my trainees just told me, “I want to finish the program for one simple reason; with 10,000 Baby Boomers a day turning age 65 the market is incredible.”

Then there’s the fact that everyone looks to Joanne for advice.

Of course, as Joanne points out, not everyone is eager to jump on the entrepreneurial wagon. In fact, she says many of her co-workers are afraid to even change departments within their same company.

Here again, problem or opportunity?

What that tells me is Joanne has an additional pool of potential clients with a different challenge. After all, not everyone understands how to survive corporate life never mind thrive there. Joanne does. And remember people already look to her for advice.

She could expand her consulting practice to work with people individually or run workshops for people on how to navigate the stress of working in a dysfunctional workplace or going through a big organizational change.

Joanne could also help people who suck at positioning themselves for promotions or moving into more interesting functions within the same company.

You can do this same exercise for just about any passion. Not sure there’s enough of a market to buy your signature cheesecake or pay you to handle their social media?

Ask all your Facebook friends to tell you on a scale of 1-10 how much they love cheesecake or are comfortable in their ability to leverage social media to grow their business. If even 10 percent go with 8 or higher, you’ll know there’s a market.

Keep in mind too you don’t have to serve everyone in the world – just enough to start earning some money.

Wayne Dyer said, “There is no scarcity of opportunity to make a living at what you love; there’s only scarcity of resolve to make it happen.”

How can you turn your problem into an opportunity? And what one thing will you resolve today to realize your own dream of making a living at what you love?

Ironically, the ability to quickly translate problems into opportunities is one of the techniques these students master in the Profiting from Your Passions® Career Coach Training program.

Seats are going quickly for the February training. I’m not sure if I’ll offer this program again this year. To learn more about whether getting paid to brainstorm is right for you, go to http://profitingfromyourpassioncoach.com/

For those of you who’ve been reading this newsletter since 1995 or even for a few months, this may seem obvious. But I assure you, not everyone is on the same page.

That point was really driven home a few years ago when I hosted a small dinner posted for a few friends.

One of my guests was taking a Spanish class. So I mentioned the invitation I’d received from International Living magazine to speak at a conference in Panama for people who want to live and work overseas.

Before sitting down for our dinner, I gave my dog Cokie his. As I mixed up a concoction of chicken and sweet potato, I reminisced about a delightful woman I’d recently met while in Paris who makes her living as a professional dog chef.

As we retreated to the living room for dessert, one of my guests picked up a copy of Sir Richard Branson’s biography on my coffee table. Much to her surprise it was autographed.

That of course required an explanation of how I wound up being part of an intimate “pick Richard Branson’s brain” roundtable followed by VIP seats atRock the Kasbah, Branson’s star-studded annual fundraiser for his mother Eve’s foundation.

(Click here for a cool video about her work helping impoverished women in Morocco to start small businesses.)

My friends have no idea who entrepreneurs like (counterclockwise) Ali Brown, Mari Smith, or Eban Pagan are.

But they definitely were wowed that I got to chat with the surprising T-I-N-Y Paula Abdul and was front row for Natasha Beddingfield, Estelle, Adelle, and Gavin Rossdale.

Then a friend and I traded compliments on earrings. She had no idea who made hers. Mine came from an impressive young Canadian jewelry designer and entrepreneur named Rachel Mielke.

I met Rachel while speaking at the Women Entrepreneurs of Saskatchewan annual conference after which she invited me to tour her nearby studio.

I’m a huge fan of the hit television show the Shark Tank where entrepreneurs pitch venture capitalists to give them money to grow their businesses.

So you can imagine how impressed I was that Rachel had successfully pitched her business on the original CBS’s show known in Canada as the Dragon’s Den. And by the age of 29, she had been invited to attend a 2008 pre-Oscar Luxury Gifting Lounge in Los Angeles

As my guests were leaving one of them noticed my tube of lip balm “Chicken Poop Lip Junk.” With a name like that, I had to tell them about my recent interview with another determined entrepreneur named Jamie Tabor Schmidt of ILoveChickenPoop.com.

Everyone told her that you can’t name lip balm Chicken Poop. As it turns out, the novelty name is the reason they buy and why Jamie got her product into a huge national chain like Walgreen’s.

That was the moment my friend Joanne exclaimed, “Wow, you live in this total other world, don’t you?”

I honestly didn’t know what she was talking about. “What do you mean?” I asked.

“Well, you just got back from speaking at a travel photography course in Paris. You’re speaking in Panama. You meet these fascinating people that no one else ever seems to meet. It’s like you exist on a planet all your own.”

As I looked around the table at my guests – a district court judge, the training director at a university, a clinical social worker, and a college professor – I realized that I may not live on a different planet, but in a lot of ways I do inhabit a very different world. It’s a place I’ve come to think of as the World of Possibilities.

Life in the Real World

Sadly, most people operate in a world they proudly refer to as the Real World. You can always tell when you’ve met someone who has never lived in – never mind entertained – the World of Possibilities.

All you have to do is start talking about how happy you are when you’re baking and how you’ve been thinking of starting a cookie business…

Or you talk about how you’d absolutely love to run tours to Provence, France…

Or that you have a life-long dream of moving to the country and starting an organic farm…

The first thing you’ll notice is that Real World people look at you like, well, like you’re from another planet. Which, compared to them you are.

Next they are quick to recite with great certainty all of the reasons why your ideas are completely unrealistic.

After all, having never started a business themselves and knowing zilch about either selling cookies or running tours, being from the Real World they nonetheless deem themselves authorities on what is and isn’t possible.

And to underscore your other world status they will flatly tell you that you just aren’t operating in the Real World.

They mean it as a dig. What they don’t realize is that this is actually a very good thing.

Because when you dwell in the World of Possibilities you know these things are doable for one simple reason: People are doing them!

The World of Possibilities

Look around and you’ll see people who have figured out that a dream + effort = profiting from your passion.

People like 55-year-old Marla Romash, who after an amazing career in politics felt the urge to do something new. Today she bakes cookies with a political theme.

Or MaryJane Butters of MaryJanes Farm. What began as a passion for organic farming has morphed into her own magazine, retail stores, a bed and breakfast, a line of food and other products, a farm school and much more

Or Cynthia Morris who, after leading successful tours to France for years literally wrote the book on how to lead tours for fun and profit (if Cynthia’s name sounds familiar, she was part of a panel discussion along with Barbara Sher, Barbara Winter, and me that’s part of Making Dreams Happen.)

It’s likely that you have a foot in both worlds.

A big part of you knows in your heart that it really is possible to open an artist’s retreat or design your own skin care line or find some way get paid to research holistic healing techniques.

But the gravitational pull to “be realistic” keeps pulling you back to the Real World.

When I started this business in 1995, I could never have imagined speaking in Panama or reviewing travel photography courses in Paris or getting to pick Richard Branson’s brain or running my own career coach training program or meeting people who run the most fascinating businesses…

And yet, here I am doing all of that and more.

And so can you.

Dale Carnegie once said, “We all have possibilities we don’t know about. We can do things we don’t even dream we can do.”

The vacancy sign is always out in the World of Possibilities.

Whenever you start to think your dream is not possible, find someone who is successfully doing the thing you want to do and follow them. I guarantee that this road will lead you to a lifetime of satisfaction, well-being, and even greater possibilities than you could ever imagine.

Being realistic is not all it’s cracked up to be. In fact, as hip-hop artist and actor Will Smith reminds us, “being realistic is the most commonly traveled road to mediocrity.”

NOTE FROM VALERIE:

Welcome to my world…one that’s about to get even bigger. That’s because next week I’m opening registration in my new 2012 Profiting from Your Passions® career coach training program.

I’ve put together a short video that spells out some of the key qualities and characteristics of people of my fellow Possibility Dwellers. Whether you’re curious about what it would be like to get paid to brainstorm business ideas as I do or not, I think you’ll enjoy video. Click here to watch.

Let’s take a look at three common mental roadblocks and learn how to overcome them.

ROADBLOCK No. 1: Wishful Thinking

How many times have you wished you’d hit the lottery? Now, how many times have you actually won the lottery? Far too many people spend far too much time wishing when they should be dreaming.

So, what’s the difference between wishing and dreaming?

Wishing is passive. We wish for things over which we have little or no control. We wish we were taller or thinner. We wish the waiter would hurry up. We wish our boss wasn’t so [you fill in the blank].

The other thing about wishes is that they are often tinged with regrets about past decisions − both big and small. We wish we’d ordered the fish instead of the chicken. We wish we’d taken the other job. We wish we hadn’t let the love of our life get away.

Dreaming is different. For one, a dream is active. Unlike wishes, we can actually do something about a dream. After all, you don’t “wish up” a plan, you dream one up!

You may not get everything you dream of getting, but two things are certain:

1. It doesn’t take a single extra ounce of energy to dream big than it does to settle.

2. You’ve got a lot more to gain by shooting high than by shooting low.

ROADBLOCK No. 2: What If Everyone Thinks You’re Crazy?

You’ve probably already thought about the people you can count on to support your plan to create a more meaningful work/life. But have you also taken stock of those you should make a point NOT to turn to?

Unless you come either from money or from a long line of pioneers, you may not get the support you want from your family. With the best of intentions, you may find your dream of quitting your job to pursue your dream career met with advice to “play it safe,” reminders that “you’re lucky to have a good job,” or a lecture on the seemingly insurmountable odds standing between you and success.

No matter how old you are, or how much you deny it, family approval does matter. This fact, of course, makes it all the more painful when the people we love fail to give us the emotional green light we so desperately seek.

Other people’s fear, skepticism, and negativity can be as contagious as the flu. And unless you’ve built up your immune system, these dream stompers can knock you for a loop − especially when they are right in your own family.

You have a choice. You can either continue to turn to these naysayers in hopes that they’ll respond differently, or you can choose the saner path of acceptance.

Don’t look for support from people whose life experiences have not prepared them to know how to support your dreams. Instead, take advantage of the support that really is available.

ROADBLOCK No. 3: Fear of Change

The closer you come to leaving the security of your 9-to-5 job (no matter how much you want out) the greater your level of excitement and trepidation (see “Word to the Wise,” below).

Anyone who has ever ventured out of their safe little world will tell you they had doubts. But when it comes to making a major life change, not only is a certain amount of fear perfectly normal, it’s actually helpful. There is a reason the web site is called ChangingCourse.com and not Jump-off-a-Cliff.com. The healthy part of fear is what will keep you from quitting your in a huff before you’ve put some other things in place. And the great thing about fear is that there are ways to deal with it.

So, try laughing in the face of fear. Am I kidding? No. Ridiculing your fears is actually a very effective technique for banishing them − because the mind rejects that which it considers absurd.

The trick is to turn your fears into a ridiculous event in your mind. That way, you allow your natural human reaction to absurdity to take over and dismiss them.

Try it yourself. Take your biggest fear and take it to extremes. Really exaggerate it. Let’s say you’re paralyzed by the fear of failure. Try picturing your entire family, all of your friends, your neighbors, everyone you went to high school with, even your boss, standing outside your cardboard-box home holding up signs that read: “We Told You So!”

Pretty ridiculous, right? When you realize that your worst-case fantasy is just that − a fantasy − what felt overwhelming will now feel much more manageable.

Another way to manage the fear of venturing out on your own is to start small. If the thought of just up and quitting your day job frightens you, start building your client base on the side. Begin with low-risk steps and gradually work your way up to the harder stuff.

Remember, courage is not a matter of losing your fear so you can take action; courage comes from taking action. And that, in turn, helps you overcome your fear. When you can act despite your fears, you will be rewarded many times over.

And just like a relationship that’s gone bad, it can be hard to walk away from a career or a small business into which you’ve put so much time and effort to say nothing of the financial investment.

Take my friend Donna. After earning her master’s degree in social work some fifteen years ago, she went into private practice as a family therapist. For the first five or so years, Donna got a lot of satisfaction out of helping others. For the last ten though, her work has felt more like a burden.

So what keeps her there? It’s simple. Donna doesn’t want to “waste” the degree.

I know it’s not easy to turn your back on an established career, especially if it’s one that pays well, has some prestige associated with it, or required earning some kind of advanced degree. And yet, think about the logic here.

What you’re really telling yourself is, “I’ve wasted the last 10 years of my life so I might as well throw away the next 20 as well. To hell with my true gifts, I’ve got more suffering to do”

John Powell once said, “The only real mistake is the one from which we learn nothing.” The fact of the matter is we all get lost from time to time. That’s life. The danger comes when we fail to heed the road signs and thus remain stuck in the breakdown lane.

I have an abiding belief that everything in life happens for a reason. The key is to find the lessons. Even my own job with the boss from hell offered invaluable lessons and experiences.

In addition to getting to travel the country, I learned in no uncertain terms to trust my instincts. That job was also just the catalyst I needed to make my final exit from the j-o-b world. And, as importantly, it introduced me people who’ve been integral to helping me succeed as a solo entrepreneur.

What should you do if you find yourself on the wrong career path? We’ll, if you’re living with the consequences of having long ignored your better instincts, get a pen and paper, find some quiet space, and put your listening ears on. Then write down everything that little voice has been trying to tell you but this time without censor or rationalization.

If you find for example, that you’ve been living someone else’s dream ask yourself:

• What does having other people’s approval or meeting someone else’s needs help me avoid or get?
• What price am I paying for this approval?
• Do the costs outweigh the benefits? If so, it’s time to start exploring your own dreams.

If you’re hanging onto a job or career solely because of all the time and money you’ve invested then the first thing to do is to let yourself get close to your fear. I’m not talking about the fear of letting the world know you made a mistake or the financial angst.

What I’m talking about is getting in touch with the one thing that should really scare the heck out of you – namely, never getting to experience what your life would be like if you pursued your true gifts and passions.

Once you let that little reality sink in, sit down and write a “Dear John” letter to your past love. Talk to your career or business. Explain that while it has been a good and faithful partner for some time that you have simply fallen out of love. It will understand.

Then pick up a paintbrush, look into culinary school, or otherwise start courting your new love interests.

It’s easy to find yourself on the wrong career track. When that happens, the key is to stay alert for warning lights, watch for the signposts along the way, learn from those inevitable detours, ask for directions, and then start slowly inching your way onto that big expansive highway called Your Life!

As George Bernard Shaw once observed, “A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable but more useful than a life spent doing nothing.”

I happen to believe every day is meant for thanksgiving. I also think that recognizing the riches in our lives is integral to the process of changing course. Let me tell you what I mean.

Chances are, the reason you’re considering shaking up your life is that you’re unhappy with the way things are right now. In fact, you’re probably painfully aware of exactly what – or who – is contributing to your current misery. It’s your lousy job… or disagreeable boss… or annoying co-worker… or maddening commute… or the day-to-day pressures and stress of the job… you fill in the blank.

You’re “here” but you desperately want to be “there.” And while you may not know exactly what “there” looks like yet, you do know this: You want your future to look very different from your present. And herein lies the challenge. How do you strive to fashion this future life, yet still live happily in the present?

In a word: gratitude. If you don’t like that word then try “mindfulness.”

You see, I believe that the key to our current well being AND our future success is the ability to be mindful of all that we have right this very minute. This is all the more true if the present is less than desirable.

That’s because, as Joe Dominguez and Vicki Robin point out in Your Money or Your Life, “So much dissatisfaction comes from focusing on what we don’t have that the simple exercise of acknowledging and valuing what we do have can transform our outlook.” Let me share with you two personal examples of how living in the present and gratitude have transformed my own outlook.

I was on a road trip through Connecticut. I don’t remember now where I was going but I do know that as usual, I was in a hurry to get there. I was making pretty good time when suddenly traffic on the interstate slowed to a crawl.

As I sat there fuming a big tractor-trailer truck edged alongside me. Even in my agitated state, I couldn’t help but notice that the side of the truck had nothing on it. It was completely devoid of advertising, company name, or words of any kind. There were no clues as to its contents whatsoever. It was completely white.

As the truck inched ahead, I could see some writing along the back. Maybe it was one of those “How’s my driving?” messages encouraging motorists to call in to report the driver’s performance. As the truck slowly pulled in front of my car, three simple words written in neat black letters came into view. The words were: Be Here Now.

I don’t know what the truck company had intended by that message but I do know the effect it had on me. The first thing I did was take a long, deep breath. My breathing slowed, my muscles relaxed. Heeding the message, I decided that instead of raging at the traffic gods I may as well pop in a CD, sit back, and do the only thing I could do – enjoy the ride.

I began to compare the simple, yet powerful, message to “be here now” with the popularity of those “I’d rather be…” bumper stickers. Some of our fellow drivers would rather be fishing. Others would rather be shopping. A personal favorite common here in this college town is, “I’d rather be smashing imperialism.” We may all fill in the “I’d rather be…” blank differently but the message is still the same – we’d rather be just about anywhere but “here.”

To be fully in the moment is no small task. Even on a good day our minds have a tendency to race ahead with plans or worries or ideas. Being present is even more challenging when the current state of affairs is the very thing we so desperately seek to change.

And yet, neglecting the present invariably leads to future regrets. Being too busy to spend meaningful time with our children, visit a sick or aging relative, exercise, or even have fun is the stuff regrets are made of. None of us will look back at our lives and wish we’d done less, but we will all wonder why we didn’t do more.

John Lennon once said, “Life is what happens when you’re making other plans.” Lennon understood that life is for living… today. What I’m trying to say is this: As you work to create that new and different future remember that changing course is as much about the journey as it is the destination.

To fully enjoy this ride called life requires that we appreciate each and every day and that we be mindful of all that we have. I realize this may not always be easy… especially when faced with illness, or hunger, or loss.

Yet even in the most dire circumstances, I’ve learned that there is always something to be grateful for. My friend’s Aunt Nancy had been diagnosed with terminal cancer. She was given no more than six months to live. She hung on just long enough to attend her grandson’s graduation. As we were driving Aunt Nancy to the ceremony, we saw the most beautiful sunset. Grinning from ear to ear I heard her whisper, “I’m so lucky. I’m so very, very lucky.” I can tell you, we all felt pretty lucky that night.

“Once we are above the survival levels,” say Dominguez and Robin, “the difference between prosperity and poverty lies simply in our degree of gratitude.” When you consciously focus on life’s gifts instead of its challenges, you’ll begin to feel rich beyond measure.

So as you enjoy a drink of clean water, a warm bed, or the company of a loved one, pause and be grateful for who and what is in your life right now. Strive toward that new future, but remember to be here now and savor the journey.

To all who celebrate this special holiday, I wish you a very happy Thanksgiving.

During a recent visit to the dentist, my hygienist Anne asked about my recent speaking tour in California. When I told Anne I’d spoken on the Impostor Syndrome to thousands of people at numerous universities, including Stanford, her response was, “Wow, you must be a real expert.” While that term doesn’t always resonate with me, I suppose I am an expert.

But what does it mean to be an “expert”? Naturally you do need to know something about the topic at hand. But how much knowledge do you actually need to consider yourself an expert?

The Expert Trap

If you’ve ever read a job description and automatically disqualified yourself because you didn’t have one or two out of a long line of competencies or the necessary experience, passed on an opportunity to speak on or otherwise showcase your knowledge because you “don’t know enough,” or not started your own business because you are not yet “an expert” then you may have fallen into the Expert Trap.

The common belief that you need to know 150 percent before you’re remotely qualified to step up the plate is a huge dream stopper. Striving to be THE expert is the knowledge version of perfectionism. And as with perfectionism, going for total knowledge can at best slow you down and at worst bring your dream to a screeching halt.

The problem for people who fall into the Expert Trap is that they suffer under the misconception that there’s some clear line of demarcation between expert and non-expert — and that they’ll somehow know when they’ve reached it. We tell ourselves, “If I can just get enough knowledge, experience, or training, then I’ll be an expert.”

And herein lies the rub — you can never know it all. It’s like the commercial where a man beams that he’s reached the end of the Internet. What makes the ad funny is its absurdity. The Internet is so vast and ever-changing that if you lived a thousand years you’d never reach the “end.” It’s the same with knowledge. There is no end. You can add to your understanding of a subject but there will always more to learn.

The Expert “Myth”

You’re especially prone to the Expert Trap if you mistakenly believe that competence and expertise are one and the same. The belief that, “If I were really competent, intelligent, qualified… I would know more” keeps far too many people from striking out on their own.

A lot of men fall victim to this same self-limiting thinking. Yet my early research, coupled with twenty-plus years of anecdotal evidence, suggests women are more prone to equate competence with knowing it all.

Apparently I’m not alone. A few years back I wrote a letter to the editor. In it I described how a man who finds himself confronted with something he’s never done before is more likely to “wing it” while a woman in the same situation often expects herself to know it all up front.

A week after my letter appeared I got this email from Dan Pink, author of Free Agent Nation and A Whole New Mind:

I just read your letter-to-the-editor in Fast Company. Great work! My hunch — speaking as a male all too willing to opine without sufficient facts — is that you’re spot-on. That at least is what I discovered during several hundred interviews with independent workers over the last two years…kudos again on telling it like it is!

Just to be clear — expertise in and of itself is not a myth. After all, we all know people who are undisputable experts in their respective fields. The myth is:

• believing that being an expert means you have to know everything there possibly is to know about a subject  
• believing you will someday be able to announce triumphantly that you have reached the end of knowledge and are “done”
• believing that if you don’t know everything there is to know, then you know nothing at all
• believing our inner voice when it says, “If I were really smart, then I would know how to do this.”

Not only is it humanly impossible to “know it all,” but the misguided pursuit to do so can kill a dream before it ever begins. As Suzanne Falter-Barns asks, “How many of us linger forever in endless training and classes, waiting to get really good at something before we plunge a single toe into the submission/rejection pool?”

Just as with perfection, the pursuit of expertise can become a convenient excuse for never moving forward. The reality, says Falter-Barnes, is that “You cannot become a master until you actually take the leap, do the work, make several thousand mistakes, and live to tell about it.” Adding, “Experience is truly the only thing that makes experts so expert.”

Finally, next time you’re rattled by not knowing it all, let yourself off the hook by remembering the wise words of Mark Twain who said: “I was gratified to be able to answer promptly. I said, ‘I don’t know.’”

My own dream list includes attending a national political convention (okay I’m weird), witnessing the opening ceremony at the Olympics, studying with a master antique book restorer, learning to water paint, taking a year-long sabbatical, and routinely taking the months of July and August off.

But the big dream that had been on the front burner for well over three years was finding a house with a view. I work at home. So where I live is really important to me. I have this thing about wanting to live in the country. Not in the woods though. I need space. Rolling hills, fields, maybe some cows in the background (I love cows!). Think pastoral, bucolic, peaceful, private.

As this dream evolved, I learned and re-learned some important lessons about dream making I’d like to pass along to you.

Lesson #1: Listen to Your Inner Voices

My obsession with a view began when I began spending time on a small peaceful lake in central New Hampshire. There’s nothing much to do there but sit out on the deck and gaze on the reflection of the mountains reflected in the lake and listen for the enchantingly eerie call of the loons.

Every summer I’d cart up dozens of books. But I rarely picked them up because it would mean taking my eyes off the view. I found it utterly mesmerizing. This little voice inside kept whispering, “Pay attention Valerie, pay attention.” Like most people I ignored these inner callings.

As the voice grew louder, it became clear that while everyone enjoys a view, I crave one. I knew then and there that I need the experience of having a view not for just a few  weeks a year — but every single day. I didn’t know then quite how I was going to pull it off but I knew I had to listen.

Lesson #2: Put Your Dreams Out There

Few people reach their dreams alone. You never know who might help you get where you want to be. It could be a casual acquaintance, your dentist, a neighbor, a coworker… But one thing is for sure, if you keep your dreams to yourself, you’ll never find out.

Throughout the last presidential election, I shared my dream of one day attending a national political convention with anyone who would listen. One such person was a seminar attendee who happened to be very high up at NBC news. Realizing an opportunity when I saw one, I pitched myself as an over-qualified but very eager intern willing to do whatever needed to be done… from making coffee, to making copies to doing van runs to the airport. He handed me his business card and told me he’d see what he could do.

Despite my champion’s best efforts, he wasn’t able to get me in. While witnessing the democratic process in action didn’t pan out, deliberately putting my dream out there got me closer than ever before. And, hey there’s always 2012!

Lesson #3: Be Selective About Who You Talk to About Your Dream

While making your dreams known is the key to finding champions, teachers, and other supporters, you also need to mindful of where NOT to look.

Take my friend Carol. She’s a great person, but she’s a bit of a cynic. When I told Carol that I wanted a house with a view, her response was, “Yeah, wouldn’t we all?” A short time later I had the pleasure of strolling along side a roaring brook. The experience reminded me of how healing the sound of moving water can be. So I decided to add a bubbling brook to my dream house wish list. When I told Carol about this latest addition she replied, “Well, you can’t always get what you want.”

Carol is right of course. You can’t always get what you want. But does the risk of not reaching a goal mean you just throw up your hands in defeat? As opera diva Beverly Sills once reminds us, “You may be disappointed if we fail, but you are doomed if we don’t try.”

Lesson #4: Believe You Can

Henry Ford once said, “If you think you can, or if you think you can’t, you’re right.” As trite as this last lesson may sound, believing your dream is attainable is fundamental to its success.

I need to be inspired as much as the next person. One place both Barbara Winter and I both go to when we need a boost of inspiration are the recording of the Making Dreams Happen workshop and retreat – and we were actually AT the event! I re-listened to one of Barbara Sher’s presentations recently and something she said reminded me of the powerful link between passion and belief.

Barbara was telling the group how deep down inside we all know what we want. “When someone says they don’t know what they want,” she says, “what they really mean is they don’t think that what they want is possible.” In other words, the reason most people never even attempt to go after their dream is because they don’t think they can.

I knew getting my dream house with a view wouldn’t be easy. First I’d have to do all the painting, repairing, and landscaping required to get my current house in shape to sell. Then I’d have to put the house on the market, which, since I planned to sell it myself meant taking photos, placing ads for open houses, and learning about all the legal hoops involved in selling real estate. I’d also need to spend countless hours scouring real estate listings, going to open houses and doing drive bys. I got so desperate at one point that I wrote to homeowners to see if they’d like to sell.

By far though I knew the most daunting task would be packing. You see I come from a long line of pack rats which meant confronting the monumental task of sorting through and packing 12 years of accumulated stuff, only to begin the unpacking all over again on the other end.

Between my travel schedule and my work commitments, I knew that achieving my dream would not be easy… but I always new it was possible. As Louisa May Alcott once wrote, “We all have our own life to pursue, our own kind of dream to be weaving… And we all have the power to make wishes come true, as long as we keep believing.”

Lesson #5: Take the Long View

Every so often I get a call for a Profit from Your Passion career consultation from someone who is having one of those “job from hell” days. The desire for immediate relief is understandable. After all when your job is toxic job you just want o-u-t, NOW!

Like these clients, you probably don’t want to hear this, but deep down you already know that making any real change takes time. At the same time you have to start somewhere. And the fact of the matter is that the next two years or five years or ten years are going to come and go as quickly as the last ones did – whether you do anything about your dream or not.

So where would you rather be when that time arrives – in the same place you are now or where you want to be? Yes, change takes time but it’s the small steps that will get you to that better future. Which leads us to our next lesson…

Lesson #6: Start Where You Are

The key to achieving any goal is to simply start. Start somewhere… anywhere. If you’re so up to your ears in debt, then start by making a plan to become debt free. If your life is so busy that you haven’t taken the time to even know what your dreams are, take some time this very week to find a quiet space and tune into your inner callings. If you need information about becoming an equine massage therapist, or bringing your product idea to market, or getting paid for your home design finesse – then get busy by finding and then learning from those who have already done it. The bottom line here – do what you can, but do something!

Lesson #7: Live in the Now

In an interview with Charlie Rose, Helen Hunt talked about how she got the career she always wanted. Although she wasn’t offering it as a tip, Hunt’s own experience of being grateful for what she had is informative. You see, for Hunt the four Emmys, the five Golden Globes, the Oscar and all of the rest were but icing on an already rich cake. Reflecting on her years as part of the Mad About You television show’s creative team, Hunt told Rose, “If none of these other things had happened and I’d had only that, I would have been a very, very lucky actress.”

It would have been easy to focus on what I didn’t like about the house I already had – it was a busy street, the houses were too close together, one of my neighbors drove me up the wall. And yet, despite aggressively pursing my dream house, I never lost sight of what I already had.

On the most basic level, I had more than millions of people around the world – a roof over my head, a bed to sleep in, heat, safety. It was also a warm, inviting, and aesthetically pleasing home. If I’d lived in that home for the rest of my life, I would have still been very lucky indeed.

The lesson here is to not focus so much on what lies ahead that you fail to appreciate past and present blessings. Taking stock of how rich your life is right now will make any future success all the sweeter.

A Room With a View

It took three years, but here I sit in my fabulous new home in the country. Perched on a hill, the house offers views on all four sides… cows in the east pasture, grand sunsets over the hills to the west, woods full of cardinals and the occasional deer out the back. And I was happy to report to Carol, a bubbling brook right outside my front door!

“Well that’s nice for her,” you may be thinking, “but I don’t have that kind of money.” I understand what it’s like to be strapped. When I left my high paying corporate job my income dipped nearly in half. There have been times I’ve wondered how I’d pay the bills. Over time I’ve managed to build my income up to more than my previous salary. Still, I didn’t buy a “starter mansion” and I’m not a wealthy person.

Money, or the lack of money, is not necessarily a prerequisite to realizing a dream. True, if I hadn’t had the good fortune to have had a starter home to sell I could not have afforded the house I got. But that doesn’t mean I couldn’t have found another way to get my view.

For example, I could have found a lower priced fixer upper. Or, I could have rented. Even better, I probably could have lived rent free as a property caretaker.

My new dream? Hiking to the bottom of the Grand Canyon!

So what are your dreams? Which one is speaking to you loudest right now? Where can you find support for your dream? Who can you safely share your dream with… who can support your dream of loving what you do? What are you grateful for right now?

Margaret Bourke White wrote, “Action stops fear.” Whether you dream of running tours in Italy or being a motivational speaker or working with horses or restoring old buildings, one truth remains. There may be many steps, but there is only one next action. What small step can you take not tomorrow, not next week, but literally this very day to take action in the service of your dream?

P.S. Would you like to experience what it’s like to live and work in a setting that makes your soul sing? Join me and a very small (6-8) people here at my home in the hills of western Massachusetts. Right now, half the spots for the Profiting from Your Passions Workshop and Retreat are taken. Click here to learn more about this unique, highly personalized event.

1. Completely clued into their dream
2. Got a few different ideas in mind
3. Got a faint glimmer or two
4. Completely clueless

I knew that between Barbara Sher, Barbara Winter, and I, we could definitely help the first three groups. To my clueless friends, I had to deliver the perhaps unwelcome news that over the next four days they may NOT discover the work they were meant to do. Not that myself and the other speakers weren’t ready, willing, and able to do everything they could to help. The reason they may not find their dream is that their dream may not yet be ready to be found.

That’s because, finding your calling is a lot like finding your soul mate. For those lucky enough to be with your life partner, you know that you came together when the right circumstances presented themselves. If you had met a year earlier, you or s/he, may, in one way or another, have been unavailable. When you finally came together it was because you were both in the right place, at the right time, for your hearts and minds to connect.

It’s the same with finding your life work. Take Mathias “Mick” Duda. Duda had been a dairy farmer in Easthampton, Massachusetts. That is until one Halloween night in the early 1960s when he was out plowing under the light of a full moon. When his tractor stalled, Duda went to a neighbor’s to borrow some gas. The neighbor happened to mention that some nearby property was for sale along the Connecticut River.

Mick bought the fertile waterfront property the very next day with the intention of farming. Now and then he’d look out over the river and consider boating as a possible hobby. But since he’d never been on a boat, never mind driven one, he didn’t give it a lot of thought. Over time though, Mick began to recognize the potential the property held and bought a few boats. One thing led to another and in 1975 the Oxbow Marina was born.

Today Mick is the owner of a thriving marina that he runs with the help of his son, daughter, and 30-plus employees. All 300 boats slips are occupied and expansion plans are in the works to accommodate more. In addition to selling boats, Duda’s company also services them. Mick even owns and flies a four-seat Cessna amphibious floatplane so he can better service customers in other locations like Lake George and the Hudson River in New York.

If this dairy farmer hadn’t run out of gas on that fateful Halloween night, he’d probably be milking cows today. Mick’s dream presented itself first in the form of the land for sale and then in the form of an idea to use the riverfront, but in both cases, only when the timing was right.

Does that mean I’m telling you to sit idly by, just waiting for Mr. or Ms. Dream to sweep you off your feet? Not at all. In fact, the more active you are in pursuing current interests and exposing yourself to new learnings and experiences, the more apt you are to meet up with your dream career.

But remember, if it doesn’t happen today or tomorrow or even next year, it may be because the time is not yet right. Don’t worry, your dream is out there. And when you and your dream are ready to come together, just as with a soul mate, it will go one of two ways. You may experience love at first sight and leap into the waiting arms of your long lost dream. Or, you may enjoy the slow dance of falling in love with your dream over time. Either way, be patient. Because when it comes to finding your dream career, timing really is everything.

Despite all the emphasis on growth in the “job sector,” I am continually amazed at just how many fascinating alternatives there are to the whole 9-to-5 schtick. And just as traditional job seekers can’t wait around for “Mr. Job” to knock on the door, people who want to do satisfying work – and call their own shots – need to be proactive as well. Francis Bacon defined a wise man as one who “makes more opportunities than he finds.” Here are a couple of other wise entrepreneurs who made it by going for it.

Sports-lover Dean Schoenewald was just 18 when he went to the Philadelphia Eagles management wearing a homemade Eagle costume and asking for a mascot job. They weren’t interested. Undaunted, Shoenewald kept showing up at Eagles football games. Pretty soon the fans adopted him as the unofficial (meaning, “unpaid”) mascot. Thirteen paid team mascot jobs, four mascot character creations (including ones for the New Jersey Devils and the San Jose Sharks), and 18 years later, Shoenewald started Mascot Mania, the only professional training school for mascots in the world.

Despite what your high school guidance counselor might have told you, showing up uninvited in a bird costume isn’t the only route to self-employment. For Dan Zawacki it all began when he was working as a sales rep for Honeywell and decided to give away 120 live lobsters as gifts to his customers. Dan was so bowled over by the response that he decided to open a small side business shipping live lobsters complete with pot, crackers, butter and bibs to crustacean-lovers from coast-to-coast. That is until his boss heard him pitching Lobster Gram, Inc. on a local radio station and promptly fired him.

In the beginning, Dan worked out of his bedroom, storing his lobsters in a used tank in his father’s garage. His first year netted only $4,000. Now LiveLob.com offers an assortment of steaks, desserts, side dishes, accessories and, of course, lobster. All and all, not a bad tale.

If you dream of making the transition from employee to self-bosser, the first thing you need to do is believe that you can. Then, the next time you see some entrepreneur doing what they love, try thinking: “Nice work – now, all I have to do is get it!”